Growing up seemed fascinating in the beginning. Moving about freely, catching up with friends, having an independent lifestyle, responsibilities, office and the likes.
I no longer had to make excuses to buy stationary or bread to go outside the building alone.
Well, that’s what I thought growing up was about. Identity. Freedom. Living.
Seemed merry in the very beginning. Hold on then. We’ve seemed to missed out on a lot of things.
It’s not as cool as it seems. At 21 I realise that I’m halfway through 40, my friends circle has reduced to less than half, I don’t think I can make very wise decisions yet, I don’t yet have my dream job, and I drop too much seasoning on pizza.
And yeah, it’s not always a process. It often happens overnight. Reality knocks in like a sly creep and be like hello there, I’m here to ruin a few things in your perfect life. It could be skin breakouts, weight gain, breakups, marriage (for some), friends, family, anything.
It wasn’t ever perfect, but things didn’t go haywire so often. Something that changes in the 20s. The frequency of drama in your life can reach an all time high.
The friends who were always perfect, don’t seem perfect anymore. The relationship that seemed to be eternal bliss, can turn to overnight terror. The jeans that you believed would last until eternity won’t button up. Such is life. It’s never going to be easy.
You can safely now believe that you indeed are growing up. And the only way you get through this is to understand and respect your own needs.
Your 20’s are your selfish years. The years you build, create, understand and accomplish for yourself.
And I put forth these words for anyone who’s already out there or getting there , that hell yeah, it’s going to be tough but you’re going to survive.
You need to buckle up buddy. Dismiss anything that does not match up to your standards. And know that you owe no one any explanation. The lighter you get through life, the better.
It’s very important at this stage that you cut off any excess negativity. You’ll thank yourself all life.
Friends who don’t seem happy to see you change or grow, relations that restrict you from being yourself or make you feel less loved, beliefs that prohibit you from following your dreams, self-sabotaging behaviour, pulling others down, the need to gossip, feeling you’re not good enough, it’s time to say goodbye.
Living must be effortless.
Your 20’s are the years for cultivating your self worth. Your true being. You create a foundation for how you will be perceived eventually. The time where you have a chance to make a great change. You need to take the plunge. There’s no other way to figure it out.
I don’t deny the fact that changes happen throughout life, but I’d like to emphasise on the great changes.
You need to explain yourself less , and live a little more. You need to be receptive to learning and growth, and not dependent on someone else’s view of you. You need to be ruthless and cut out things that no longer serve your core beliefs.
You need to set your personal boundaries. Define your taste than following mere trends. You need to chase those dreams that you have envisioned. You need to fall. Lift yourself up. Experiment. LIVE!
Don’t be so harsh on yourself my friend. It hasn’t been easy for anyone. All you can do is live each moment fully. Stop chasing things you don’t need. Don’t settle for less than you deserve.
Anything that makes you feel less than yourself must be buried here, in the 20’s. You’re worth a lot. We’re all worth a lot.
You deserve all the love and happiness you radiate to the world. You deserve to have a happy, drama free life. You deserve to be forgiven for your mistakes. You deserve to be loved. And you shall be loved. It’s best to start with yourself.
solaceworks 